I’m a mum

I’m a single mum,

I’m a widow,

I’m 48,

I’m mum, to Alex, Nikki, and George!

one minute I was married,

then pregnant,

then mum to 1,2,3 babies who entered this world (and 3 who didn’t),

I stayed at home, moments were filled with breast feeding, finger painting, massages, picnics, beaches, tantrums, snots, potties, shrieks, spits and smiles…

I was happy, very happy, at home being a mum!

Then WHAM, BHAM…the curve ball of cancer came crashing like a crescendo into our home!

I became a working mum, an absent mum (due to hospitals and caring for dad), family and friends became mum to my Cups..

I was scared, I was frightened, I was hurting…

when I looked at their faces, I hid my own,

I showed strength when I felt weak,

I gave them energy when I was exhausted,

I showered them with love when my heart was breaking..

I reached inside my heart of mummy and pulled out what they needed most

‘THEIR MUM’

….4 years on as single mum, there are still tantrums from teenagers, snots at broken hearts, painting on faces (now), noise, lots of it, and screens instead of screams, and lots of laughter…..

NOW, there are four hearts that beat as one,

….and I am still wondering if I am getting this mum thing right?

•